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Instead, I spent my first year pacing the fluorescent-lit halls of my dorm, making tearful, jealous phone calls to my high school boyfriend in California.

When that relationship ended, I realized I had behaved like a crazy person.

When I moved to New York City for college, I had seen every episode of Sex and the City approximately 200 million times.

I knew the show was fantasy, but a small part of me hoped that in New York I’d lead the kind of adventurous dating lives its characters did.

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Here, seven real guys give the first date tips and ideas they're secretly hoping you'll adopt ASAP.

” At this point, his texts are exhausting (plus, Emma says not to waste time texting when meeting in person is much more telling), so we set up a date. I suggest a public place where I’m less likely to be murdered. One of them is Banker Bro, who pushes our date back 15 minutes right before we’re supposed to meet, because, well, his job is super important. It’s there I meet a very handsome friend of a friend—Patio Pal! Before parting ways, I get so giddy that I almost forget Emma’s first challenge—giving my number to a guy. Andrea, the author of , tells me to ignore what I’ve heard about dating and trust my gut. Make a list of “must-haves” (mine include “has my back” and “makes me laugh”) and “can’t-stands” (“inauthenticity” and “obsessed with sports”). She also tells me to ask myself two questions on dates: “Am I having fun? ”Nude Dude texts to reschedule our date again, and Andrea throws me this line to use on a flaky guy: “Sounds like a busy time. He replies immediately: “I’ll be in touch sooner than you think :)” The next day, he sends me a pic of him holding a Budweiser on a rooftop.

I know this because once he shows up, it’s all he talks about, except for when he says we shouldn’t help homeless people. We talk briefly in a group, and when the friends he came with leave for the night, he sits next to me. Why don’t you reach out when you’re free and we’ll try to make something work? I haven’t heard from Patio Pal since we met, so I text him.

Each contributing writer will share a true story, from texting to sex to breakups.

Today, Emily Johnson talks about taking a six-year hiatus from dating and how she broke the ice…